October 21, 2011

A little bit of EVIL in my life!

Am I a good person? I don’t think so. Doesn’t appear like that to me. But I haven’t done much worse either. More or less it’s been a balanced life. What got me thinking though was the fuck load of a discussion 2 guys were having about Heaven and Hell on a bus journey from my one office campus to the other, sitting next to me, a few days back. But those were puerile discussions, it was like listening to Harbhajan and Sreesanth discussing rising prices of tomatoes. It was going nowhere. I didn’t gain much out of it, so I started building some blocks on my own.

Heaven, for me, is like getting into a highly reputed institute, where 85% seats are reserved for lower castes as they didn’t get enough opportunities in their lives to organize aartis, bhajans, havans and the likes. So they’d now have to do it face to face. That is, praise thy lord. Heaven, if such a thing really exists, I am sorry to be the one to bring this to you, but most of us are not going to make the cut. But, do we really need to? And if yes, what does it depend upon? I would assume it has something to do with goodness of a being.

Goodness but, is nothing more than a beautifully flawed concept. As they say, ‘the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn’t exist’’. Well, he does exist and it’s called Goodness, righteousness, morality, integrity and everything that you have ever thought of to be of any good. God, in fact, wants us to be wicked.

According to Newton’s 3rd Law; every action has an equal and opposite reaction. And if that’s true, which I guess most people consider it to be, the chivalry, the selflessness, the philanthropy, and in fact every deed of moral righteousness and integrity that you perform attracts an equal and opposing act of loutishness, self-centeredness,  wickedness and the so called terrorist acts of the world. Actio et reactio. Now would I want this world to go through that tragedy, destruction and dismal performances by mortal beings, I ask myself? No, absolutely not! Especially when my actions determine how things pan out around me.

Just because someone lured us with the notion of heaven, doesn’t mean I go around helping strangers, be nice to them, when clearly it has dire consequences. Who knows what form the opposite reaction might take? It could take the form of a suicide bomber, although the intensity has to be the same as that of the action, so probably they’ll not blow up the twin towers, rather blow up the fictional twin towers from Lord of the Rings which would be heartbreak for millions of fans around the world. That counts for something. Right?

Not that I don’t want to be good now or that I don’t want to help people around. I do. And that is exactly why I shouldn't. Because I put something positive out there in the world, someone else has to balance it out with something completely opposite. It would make someone meaner and rude. I don’t want that now, do I? I care about the world enough to not give a shit anymore.

For every particle; there’s anti particle. For every matter; there’s anti matter.
For every girl I ever loved, I had my heart broken.
For every glorious cricket shot I played, someone tried to kill me with a fucking beamer.
For everything that you DO, there's someone who does the opposite. 

This brings us to the most important and the path breaking question of our lives. The corollary!! If every action has an equal and opposite reaction and every positive action has a negative reaction associated; then clearly, every negative action is bound to induce and stimulate a positive chain of events and actions.

Now if you think of it, it is a revolutionary idea. The more you destroy, the more people will attempt to build. The more you disintegrate and disrupt, the more people will join hands to fight it. What defines the level of positive change is directly proportional to the levels of harm done. History has been a proof of this. Crimes are single handedly responsible for most of the technological advancements in the world. It forced geeks, who retort to a laid back attitude after a minor success in the world of technology, to comeback with a brilliant idea that could fucking blow your mind. Advancements are the reaction and Criminals acts as a catalyst.

During World War II, US dropped bombs on Hiroshima and Nagasaki and Japan surrendered on 15th August 1945. But that is just half a story. What followed was a period of record economic growth for 45 continuous years for Japan, something that the world has never seen before. And this is just one example, there are many more. We are just interpreting the messages wrong all this time.

If an act, even though negative, can bring about a positive reaction in the world then I am going to be a part of it. And you all should be too. This is our chance to make peace in the world by destroying as much possible within our powers.

Sacrificing my own chances of a door to heaven is the only choice I have got left which my conscience would allow. My goal is as lucid as it has ever been. I can imagine the change molding into something people have always dreamt of. World Peace!  And the way to world peace is destruction. Self annihilation. Ruthlessness. Brutality. The only difference between a hero and a villain is press coverage. I am ready to take that leap of faith into the dungeon of ignorance and self loathing, just because it brings a change in your life. I don’t want the press coverage. I want change. I am going to make your life better, by trying my best to devoid you of any life whatsoever.  I am going to be your HERO and the world’s VILLAIN. I am the key that take you to heaven.

I am going to be a criminal. I am going to be a scoundrel. I am going to get EVIL. Also, they often seem to possess cool gadgets, sexy cars, girls in bikinis around, magic wands, boundless stocks of alcohol and what not. What if not Heaven? Hell is the closest thing they have got to themselves. See ya there.

There, I just killed a mosquito. Bam!

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